Wednesday, January 7, 2009

Humbling and beautiful start for 2009





It’s been a humble beginning of the year 2009 or in Chinese the end of year of the Mouse. Before reaching into the year of the cow, my Chinese horoscope suggest there will be some trouble in the making and trouble indeed came, got a ticket from traffic for driving with non-renewed license and the complete broken down of the engine that cause me a great fortune.
What so amazing about this is that, if these happen in the previous year I’d be so angry that it’s uncontainable, yet this time there’s hardly any spark at all. There’s just this calm emotion when I’m dealing with the police. It’s a mistake, admit it, pay the price and move on. Nothing much to be angry about or blame anyone or myself. Yup, I forgot to renew my license, renew it, pay the compound and move on. So do with my car breaking down. The engine is hanged, taken out and replaced almost everything and put back on. So it’s over 3000 bucks of repair fees. I admit, I did get a bit overwhelmed by the fact that I have to pay so much. But after all, the car is fixed, the payment is made, now I just need to pay off the credit card. Not much harm done but one more month into clearing my credit.
Some suggested I change car, in this economy? And the car is as good as new now. Why bother to pay 30k more? I have a good car that served me for over 10 years now. No holes, no nothing bad about it, and the engine runs even better than 10 months ago, so why change? I did pay for the repair already. There’s no fuss. Besides I do have plan to buy a new car with cash in due time. Not when I’m lost or frustrated or simply because the old one broke down. It’s mechanics, it’s bound to be break down someday. So when I really want to buy a car, then I’ll buy one.
Which is why it’s humbling. We learn, to control, to release, to adapt, to pick things up faster. While everyone around me is like pity me and think it’s a shame that I should pay all the money right before the Chinese New Year. And think I should be more careful or judge about my misjudgments, (don’t get it wrong, I do learn to take care of my car and remember to renew the license and avoid paying more unnecessary thing) but I’m not emotional or angry about this “small stuff” that have already come and passed and all there is to do is fix and pay. Spare the guilt, everything changes, for the better or for worse, we just learn and adapt and work it out. That’s all there is to do isn’t it? Oh and feel good about me being able to pay for it, and being grateful for having the fortune to notice the problem before the new year comes. Just feels great.
Just like they ask me how to reduce credit card interest or how to fix a problem in a mail server that’s not your own server. Simple just contact the person, the manager and ask them to fix it. Negotiate with the bank and come out with a way to lower them. Send a report or official complain letter to the server company and ask them to rectify it. Sometimes the outcome may not be as you expected, but sometimes you might be surprise by an even better outcome. That beats you sitting in a corner, thinking profusely about the problem and blaming everyone including yourself every second that passed about problem that takes about 10 seconds to pay off or fix or reschedule or some patience that in due time when you have the money or follow a schedule of payment it’ll be solved.
From my past experience with the credit card thing, I find that I put in a lot of effort to calculate how I can clear the credit, what to pay with it and what not when I have too much to pay off and not enough money to. And the more I do it, the more I think about it the more I get frustrated and the more I spend with it. So to make things simple, take out all the bills, calculate what you need to pay in one month, save the actual cash for it every month and the rest pay off the card. And one more good suggestion, closes the card and the account, and call the bank to negotiate a better interest rate. Then you’ll be done in one year or 2 year or more but eventually it will be pay off. No fuss. Just use cash. And it does feel better to be able to pay with cash. It felt more real actually.
I don’t mind telling all the story and be judged. For it is the person that judges that suffer the emotion and the tantrums. I hardly have any reaction to this kind of things now. Because I move on, learn from it, do the right thing, make a decision and move on. They say the emotion is a motivation, yup, the enthusiasm to fix the problem with a part time job and focus and do it well and enjoy it, that’s the motivation, not the blame, the guilt, the alternative reality, you could go mad, looking at numbers and punching the calculator and yourself every hour every single day. Just face it, the reality is such and such, take responsibility for what you have done, regardless it’s a fortunate or accidental or misfortune that cause it at first, and then start moving and fix the problem. That’s all, simple, easy and no stress, no frustration, no psychotic break downs. And thank God for giving you a lesson, to learn faster, to know that you have what it takes to solve it and for giving you the courage (when you ask for courage and love, you think God will give you courage and the fuzzy feeling of love? Or give you the chance to love or be courageous?).

So Relax and enjoy your life and enjoy this 2009

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