I Was an extremist, I Was a perfectionist, and then I turn into an oppotunist and then I got angry and then I Felt Inferoir.
all of which is my past.
but No more. for to live well and simple and happy. what's past, what's my identity is and what's I've did is not important. For I Am Me. Now I Am who I Am Now.
and it'll will come to past too in the near second future.
We do things, stupid things and brings conversation and that's Karma. but that is just the universe response to our work but non of it defines who I Am.
I've did many many stupid things and many brings bad results. But After I'm freed. everything seems just so little. All the suffer I've gone through are in the past which brought me to this stage of life. but still none of it defines who I Am.
It's the journey of my life. It's experience. It's my life. but It's not exacty me. for I Am not defined by one moment in time. I'm all that have past and all that is to come. So are All of you. Just live. Choose to Live Now. and let go of any past and just peacefully accept anything that's coming and then enjoy the ljourney, good or bad. Time is not the essense.
You might think that I'm just convincing myself. But you can judge anyway you like. for anything you think is only in your mind. they have no effect at all on me. For I don't know what you are thinking. I only know who I Am Now. And In my world I'm fine, Happy, Living, Peaceful and Ready to move on every second. That's me, Letting Go of everything and Just....... Living. When in old days, Just Living..... means much less than perfect now, without boredom and with just inspiration. the quietness of life is not boredom instead it's become peace.
It is strange how things can seem so different though the situation and condition remain the same.
My friend say how come I watch so many movie alone? and they say good things should be shared with friends. To Me Now. moment are the thing we shared with friends. but enjoying art are really subjective and there's no sharing involve. And to have a person to go to 5 movies a week with you is insanely unlogical. so I go alone and enjoy the art alone or with the public audience. every crowd have their own unique timing to the moment of the movies. and that's enjoyable to me. As for time with friends I do have it when friends actually willing to go with me and I don't mind going for a movie for the second time with different people. what's most important is the moment we share. In actual fact I've watch Titanic like 10 times and Lord of the Rings for 7 times with different people.
So anger and eager became enthusiastic, boredom and loneliness became peace and enjoyment, and bad consequence due to past doing becomes a learning experience, maturity and acceptance.
In the context of it all, I can't change the past and I can't control what's to come. what I can do, feel, inspire and perform in Now. so I choose to Live Happily, peacefully and enjoy now, and share it with the world.
Monday, May 12, 2008
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